Egg Man...

I only thought of that song because we were having wings...which made me think of a wing man..which, in turn, didn't really seem like the most apropos topic for a food blog...but, since chickens have wings and they lay eggs..I thought we could talk about one of THE greatest albums of all times...Paul's Boutique..can we get at least a little finger clap for the Beastie Boys????  Well...we should really move along..I have to work in the morning (allow the crying to commence....)  I would much prefer not work, but wouldn't we all????

"'Tis a causeless fantasy, is it not, Mama?????  Perhaps we should be a little more pragmatic, no???"

Sesame Speckled Sticky Wing Components: Wings, Soy Sauce, Sesame Oil, Ginger, Honey and Garlic...

We had special wings...kinda like me...but special in the bad way...not the good way, unfortunately...

Time to create the marinade...begin with soy sauce....we have a series of 'action' shots...and I use that term 'action' quite loosely..the world of a food blogger can be rather daunting..hahahahahahahaha..I am SO kidding...I need to get out a little more often, IMHO...is it THAT obvious????

Add some sesame oil...can you feel the pressure mounting...just like the big banks and the municipal bonds....the anticipation is gargantuan in size...hahahahaha...again, I kid...although now I really wish I could turn up Paul's Boutique...

Rope a dope...the newest in new...we're kicking the new k-nowledge...the sound of science....

add some honey...sorry..I was wayyyy off track..I blame those Beastie Boys...it's totally their fault..as I am never unfocused...nope...

Marinate your wings...They remained whole..for presentation purposes..although raw chicken is possibly the grossest thing ever...visually speaking, of course...I'm still trying to figure out why I posted this photo..maybe just because..that's my best excuse...and I am lacking a better word....After they have spent some time in the marinade...roast at 425 for about 30 minutes..

"Hey, Ladies...check out those abs on Puck..be still my little heart...I may just faint in the kitchen...perhaps he can carry me home tonight!  hahahahahahahaha" 

Yellow Rice..well...it is delish.and I may just be saying this because I've had two waffles in the past two days..yeah...that's about it...no blogging typically equals no cooking..which means no eating....you'll need some butter, chicken stock and a carrot for your rice..it's like the MacGyver of rice dishes...hahahahahahaha...someone got a paper clip and a rubber band....we could totally blow something up with that..or at least be on the 6 o'clock news....!!!!

Saute your rice...

Continue to add chicken stock and simmer....while the wings roast in the oven...

"Hey baby won't you look my way......I am awfully cute and such..."

The final wings...ugh..stupid ghetto cam....

I told myself earlier...don't use the square plate...it's not going to work, yet I used the square plate...I really need to learn to not listen to myself...proceed to sprinkle with scallions and sesame seeds...honestly, this was one of the tastiest dishes I have made...but I am filled with absolute disappointment on the plating....those square plates, and ghetto cam need to just go...good riddance..I am sure they have had the time of their life...hahahahaha..who wouldn't..especially here!  hahahhahahaha...only chainsaw jugglers need answer that question...

Well...we worked very hard today so we wouldn't have to work tonight..and I somehow feel it was all for nothing..as their is still more work to be done...isn't that sad in addition to being a conundrum of epic proportions???  I'm still stuck on the whole drama thing...sorry..again...I blame the causeless fantasy...oh, and Paul's Boutique..maybe a little AWOLnation and a tiny bit of Pierre Bouvier...but..I am merely guessing at this point...again, we are working on getting out more...go make some wings....and rice...they were delicious...remember..everybody talks...tooo much...;-)

Waffles are not Awful....

However, speaking of awful...rain..well, rain is awful...and it really just needs to stop...it really put a damper on our Saturday....hahahaha..can we at least get a little finger clap for idioms???  anyone out there????  But waffles on the other hand are delicious, and they provide for an excellent foundation in the creation of a sandwich...please join us on our journey....fasten your seat belts, my internet friends...it could be a bumpy ride...hahahahaha..again, this drama...I should save it for my mama..but that would be zero fun!  We made a Frosted Flake encrusted chicken sandwich topped with cole slaw and bacon all layered in between two waffles...and some homemade potato chips...it should be unlawful!  Perhaps not...again...the exaggeration..however, again I can imagine it wasn't exactly a low-cal sorta thing...

"Oh, Mama....I think I hear crickets...oh, wait...maybe that's just rain drops I hear...well, um..no...I'm fairly certain those are crickets..sorry..hahahahahahahaa"

Begin with a Chicken Breast and some Buttermilk...

You can make your own buttermilk...a little vinegar and cream...I found that out today...Boy, The Google...it does great stuff...marinate the chicken in buttermilk for a bit...prior to the marinating, pound it flat..yeah..again, you get to beat the crap out of a piece of chicken...you've seen me do that a million times...so I spared you the gory details...some day you'll thank me, I'm quite certain...

Peanut Oil (or some other type of oil, however, peanut is best...IMHO, of course) is necessary for making potato chips...

you could also bake or, insert gasp here, make them in the microwave...ugh...I read about that on The Google as well...

it made my eyeballs bleed....microwaved potato chips????  Ewwwwwwwww...that's about as hideous as some guy sporting a Speedo or listening to Paris Hilton 'sing.'

Alright..proceed to heat your oil of choice and add thinly sliced potatoes...I used a knife...again, I omitted the slicing shot...for your sake, no doubt...but you could use a grater or mandoline...just throwing suggestions out there...it is Saturday Night...we didn't have a lot going on...which would imply there should be more to our meal..again...I'm all about setting the bar as low as it can go...I blame this stinkin' rain...There will be zero disappointment over here on the west side of town..maybe..maybe not.. 

After your chips have fried, drain and sprinkle with sea salt...allow to cool on a rack..

Meanwhile...we need to prepare a coating for our chicken...Mayonnaise, Dijon, Honey, Garlic, Cayenne and Frosted Flakes...Yup...Frosted Flakes are delish on chicken...trust me on this one....

Remove your chicken from the buttermilk marinade...meanwhile combine mayo, dijon, cayenne, garlic and honey...coat your chicken with the mixture then coat with crushed Frosted Flakes....again, we're missing a step or two here, photograph wise...I blame ghetto cam this time...my on/off button is about to stop working...it's all weird...I can turn it on after several attempts...but I have to take the batteries out to turn it off...it is in rather sad shape...I dropped it again the other night, after I fell...I think we both may need to reside in those hollow spheres of clear plastic..like the ones for hamsters and gerbils...it seems like a logical way to prevent future damage....to both of us...

Brown your chicken....finish in the oven..10-15 minutes...

Place cooked chicken atop your waffle...Now, I will admit...we did cheat again tonight...I do not own a waffle iron...I would have definitely preferred a homemade waffle...but I won't be here too much longer and I'm not lugging a waffle iron all the way across the country..so...can we get a little finger clap for Eggo...I toasted them under the broiler...I don't have a toaster either...In fact, there are lots of things I don't have...do you have the time???  hahahahhaha...like that Willis Coach Bag, in Mahogany...I STILL don't have that!

Add mayonnaise and bacon...

Top with Coleslaw...

Ta-Daaaaaaa....The Assembled Sandwich...

"Oh, Mama...what kind of food can't make up it's mind????  A waffle!  hahahahahah..get it????"

Our final meal...with the potato chips....again, this did not plate well..I think I need to do a little more research on some recipes..although it was very delicious...

Our journey began on Saturday night, however circumstances allowed it to lead into Sunday...it's almost kinda, sorta, maybe like the Twilight Zone..(the horror and the supernatural, of course)....and at least we were able to post two whole nights in a row...that's a new record...my sofa is gone..which is a good thing...it wasn't stolen..it did have my permission to leave the apartment..we are planning on returning tomorrow...don't underestimate the power of a waffle sandwich...it does good things and tastes delicious...like..um...lots of things, shall we say!  hahahahaha...And while we are huge waffle fans, of the small crisp batter cake...we never waffle...we're very good at making up our minds...maybe..possibly, and shall we throw in a perhaps...see all y'all tomorrow...