Sunday, July 24, 2011

Double Date Night!!

Before I delve into the date deets...I will first introduce you to the newest member of the household.  I didn't want to do it, but I really, really, really had no choice...
Meet Felix...my new fan.

Now a new fan purchase my not be very exciting to most....but when you live alone, you have to seize opportunities as they are presented.  Don't get the wrong idea about the two of us.  He knows there is no 'us.'  Before I made the commitment to bring him home, we had a long talk at the Fred Meyer...I explained my expectations.  He is well aware that he is to remain cool at all times, and he can only come into the bedroom if he respects my '5 foot rule..'  Otherwise, we're over.  I don't care what sort of tricks he has up his sleeve...I have boundaries!  He also is well aware that once he has served his purpose, his new home will be on the corner of Dolph and 30th holding a 'free' sign.  A gal's gotta do what a gal's gotta do!  I was considerate enough to consult with the other members of the household before allowing Felix to stay.  E.V was opposed and hates anything that creates a sudden type of movement, but she was quickly out-voted by the sofa, Sharon and end tables Eddie and Rick.  I run a mean democracy in these here parts!  Barstools Betty, Mort and Ethel wanted to stay out of the entire thing.  And, I really do not blame them at ALL!

I will have you know I assembled him myself, and yes, I am most certainly bragging..simply because I had only ONE leftover piece.  Unlike everything else around here I have put togther with an allen wrench and my wits!  I realize there should never be any leftover pieces..but the directions were quite confusing.  I could have used more pictures!  It took a good hour or two.  It gave us a chance to bond, considering the rough time I had given him earlier in the day.  Heck, if the summer goes well, maybe I'll just keep the little rascal around and when I retire, he could come along to Belize with me!  It could very well be a hoot!  Next year I believe I'm getting a box fan...the box fan had me at 'no assembly required.'  I already have a name picked out, too...Billie Joe.  Here's looking forward to next summer!

Now that introductions are out of the way....Allow me to move on to the double date E.V. and I had this evening, with two very cool and sweet fellas named Ben and Jerry.  E.V and I did have a minor 'girl' incident over who got to be with Jerry...but we compromised.  IF she let me ride shotgun, she could have Jerry all to herself...I'd be OK with Ben.  We feasted on Phish Food and Americone Dream.  It was heavenly.  But that E.V., let me tell you, she is QUITE the diva.  I never thought she'd ever be ready to go....

"Mama, does this harness make me look fat?????"

Again, she drove me crazy and we just could NOT leave until her make-up was perfect!
"Am I wearing too much mascara???  What do you think of this eyeshadow??  Do I have bone breath??  Did you remember to bring Tic-Tacs???"

Several hours later we were off.  The date was a hoot!!  I did catch E.V and Jerry making out later on the sofa...but quickly turned the other cheek.  Unfortunately, there are certain moments in your life that you wish were more like text messages....you push delete and it is as though they never existed....However, this was not such said moment.  Her secret is 'safe' with me because I'm very good at keeping my mouth shut.  hahahahahahaha. 

After the excitement-filled date, we decided to have some dinner.  It was much later than I hoped, but I just couldn't get Jerry to leave my apartment.  I finally had to get Felix to rough him up a bit.  So, I guess we'll see if E.V. gets a call tomorrow morning.

"Mama, what's that heavenly aroma coming from the kitchen?!?!?  Yum!!"

It didn't even reach 90 degrees today, but it was hot here for a change.  I'm not complaining, again, as mentioned multiple times, I am not one to complain.  And for those of you in any other part of the country...please do not show up at my front door with clubs and torches...I know you have suffered...and suffered greatly.  I'm also a sympathetic kind of gal, too!


Bacon blue cheese burger on a potato pancake 'bun' although it sort of looks like a blob...again, lighting is critical.  I should just eat sooner...  Note to self.. :-)

I smelled the heavenly scent of grilled meat, and thought it was a perfect evening for a burger!  It is atop a potato pancake.  I was going to grate the potato, because potatoes are great.  hahahaha..  Then, realized I didn't have a grater, which makes me not so great!  hahahaha.  (aren't puns the BEST!).  I had no choice but to use a microplane zester.  I love the zester, but to zest a potato is just brutal.  My arm was numb and I could hardly grasp a tissue.  Anyway, it was easy to make and quite tasty!  To brown and somewhat melt the cheese, I used my creme brulee torch!  One of THE most awesome tools around!


"I rock!  Not only am I useful in the kitchen, I also make a great weapon.  I can melt someone's eyeball completely in less than 10 seconds!"  Powerful words from such a small device!  Be afraid...very, very afraid.  Intimidation is critical! :-)

It was very handy to have Torch Tony around this evening.  Especially considering I have about the world's second worst stove in existence.  Seriously, I was thinking it would be better to go back to the Flinstones age...a metal box with a fire-breathing dragon that lives underneath..primitive, but yet ingenious!.  I am quite certain it would cook my food more efficiently and evenly that my present oven.  However, I'll say it again...I never, ever complain!!!


Thanks for joining us.  I apoligize for the lack of a post yesterday.  I went out to dinner with a friend and wound up not cooking here at my place.  It was delicious!!  Take care and have a great evening.  See you later!!

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