"Oh, Mama...it probably happened because you were wearing that hoodie...the one with the fuzzy collar..I'll totally bet that's why...hahahaha...at least our knight in shining armor on the fourth floor was kind enough to walk all the way downstairs to allow us into the building...Oh, wait...he's the King..that's right....and a gigantic smarty-pants...I almost forgot..."
Soooooooooooo...anyway...amongst these series of unfortunate events, one I failed to mention, much to your chagrin....I lost all off my photos on ghetto cam..I think it was wearing a hoodie....or maybe it was a Koozie...I forget...But tonight I somehow was able to recover these photos..as this meal was made last night..but I couldn't blog earlier as the pictures disappeared...Yay for you I found them..hahahahaha...we had Doritos tonight..I haven't had a Dorito in about 5 years..but I decided to splurge..and I know they're bad and gross and disgusting..but in a good way..like chicken mcnuggets...and they were delicious...just ask my fluorescent orange fingers...but we made a Puff Pastry Pizza!!!
Puff Pastry, Yellow Squash, Zucchini, Garlic, Onion, Crushed Red Pepper, Olive Oil, Basil and Feta
Proceed to slice all of your vegetables..zero injuries...my knife, at this point, is so dull...hahahahahahaha...like me and this blog....sorry, I couldn't resist...again, if you can't make fun of yourself you can't make fun of others...and that's no fun IMHO...
Drizzle your squash with olive oil and pepper...toss to coat...
Place your veggies under the broiler for a few minutes...just to create a little color...
"Mama...it started with a whisper...everybody talks...."
While your squash broils...saute onion and garlic in a little olive oil...to soften and such..
Deglaze with some balsamic vinegar...this makes a HUGE mess..but it smells heavenly...
Roll out a sheet of puff pastry...it's a total cheat move, but again...I have this terrible fear of yeast and making dough...kinda, sorta, maybe the same way I feel about artichokes...simply scary...like my singing...and like pleated jeans...and clowns...Anyhoo...roll out your puff pastry..a rolling pin was used..this was not documented...again, it happened...for reals...proceed to sprinkle with crushed red pepper...
Add your squash...We also grated a little bit of parmesan cheese as well...I can't grate cheese and take pictures at the same time...my bad..sorry...so, again, I did for reals!
Place your balsamic onions atop everything...
Sprinkle with Feta Cheese...The walls weren't built to crumble...but feta cheese was, BTW...and we didn't even stumble..
"Mama..that's a lie...you were wearing those flip flops..you should know better...I personally witnessed you come down freely under the influence of gravity...or maybe the influence of a martini??????? hahahahaha....however, it was rather embarrassing...shhhhhhh....yikes!!!!"
Bake your pizza at 400 degrees....10-15 minutes...this picture was HORRIBLE..but it was the only one I had...of the finale, mind you...the steam sorta, kinda, maybe smudged up the lens on ghetto cam...and since it's in such bad shape, I had no idea...but, it's only pizza..not that I would ever discriminate against pizza...I love it...it's just not something which plates all too well...I should just stop...
Well, my internet associates...hahaha...I just liked that...not sure why..perhaps, well maybe just because I did...Make some pizza...it's not nearly as good as Park Pizza..but then again, we didn't have any Yuengling either...oh, well..soon...very soon....Oh, be sure and have some Doritos...zero regrets..well, maybe one or two...just don't eat the whole bag..and fear not the hoodie...they are a ubiquitous fashion item...and they rock..like cute racecar drivers...and the You Tube..and boots...and I could go on and on...I shall stop...see, my thoughtfulness never ceases....it's a win-win situation for everone!!
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