"Oh, Mama...Swing..Swing..I love, love, love that song...turn it up! Days do swiftly come and go...I wanna be an All American Reject!" We already are Eves...we already are...tisk-tisk....
"My dear, Mama...Can you help me find a way to carry on again...you thought your problems were gone...this is the last song...BTW...I'm totally digging this fleece comforter...It's about as rockin' as 700 thread count sheets...just sayin'."
This evening's meal was a complete and utter experiment...I like experiments, not necessarily of the food varitey, but more along the chemistry variety...for a myriad of reasons...especially when I'm super-duper hungry...'cause a failed food experiment can leave one still hungry...but, then again, a failed chemistry experiment can leave you blind or fingerless or limbless...worst-case scenario, no doubt...How did I even get to this point...hmmm..Anyhoo...the meal...sweet and sour chicken with pineapple fried rice...The creation of negative energy was not my intent...I'm such a positive and up-beat kinda gal in general..hahahahaha...
Pre-cooked Rice, Fish Sauce, Ginger, Garlic, Egg, Pineapple and Green Onion
Mince the garlic and ginger....chop up your pineapple and sprinkle with just a bit of sugar...then scramble an egg (sorry...)
We jumped ahead just a tad, as the initial steps of frying my garlic and ginger didn't turn out...I totally blame my ghetto camera...regardless, saute ginger/garlic, then add your rice and pineapple...while I blame tmy camera...I kinda, sorta, maybe believe it has a little bit to do with my being distracted..shocking, I know..I'm never distracted..EVER...this is unconfirmed and such, but we may or may not have been shaking some bootie during this process...Ya been so good to me....Ya make me wanna shout...little bit softer now...little bit louder now...Jump..Jump..Jump..Scream...Shout..Shout..PUCK!! hahahahaa
After you have fried the pineapple with the rice, add some fish sauce...fish sauce is SO delicious...and it makes all of the difference in the world...trust me...then add your scrambled egg and chopped scallions...
While your rice stays warm on the stove-top, we can move along to our sweet and sour sauce....it is your lucky night...fo' sho', fo' sho'...I'm on a roll...no self control..nope...we gotta blow off some steam, no???? And since Puck isn't reaching out and touching me, we shall cook...and we still will have good times...winkety-wink...
Cider Vinegar, Rice Vinegar, Crystalized Ginger, Sugar, Pineapple and H20 and Soy sauce (H20 and soy sauce not in this photo...they were stuck in traffic...I-5 was like a parking lot!! They didn't make it until the last possible second..whew!)
I made my own pineapple juice, mostly because I tend to forget to purchase key ingredients for my meals..and that's because I make lists and forget them...and I needed pineapple juice...and I had pineapple...and a blender..and didn't want to run out just for some pineapple juice...and I'm a total WIP..and I almost made out with the homecoming queen...and I almost had you..and I was THISCLOSE to giving up listening to Bowling For Soup...and it doesn't even look like pineapple juice...this pic really reminded me of Starry Night by van Gogh...are ya seeing it, or is it just those martinis????
Combine all of your sauce ingredients and reduce on the stovetop...I allowed it to simmer for quite a bit...you want it to thicken..but be careful...it reminds me of a gastrique (which is similar)..and the sugar can burn...so if you shake bootie...do NOT become too pre-occupied...that is my PSA for you this evening..an early holiday gift of sorts....
"OMG..MAMA! Is that Hey Soul Sister???? Turn it up!!!!! I don't want to miss a single thing, especially that Darren Chriss cutting a rug...he can cut it on my rug anyday...He IS a sweet moonbeam and my teenage dream....Just sayin'!"
We shall progress to the star of our show....and no it is NOT a massive, luminous sphere of plasma held together by gravity...that's ME...hahahahahahaha...no...not really...I am KIDDING...it's chicken...but chicken rocks...like knee socks...and...do ya really want me to go down this road...didn't think so...you know how I do feel about chicken....on a side note, I DO like chicken and stars, the soup....a random thought from the Lone Foodie on a Tuesday...sorry...
Chicken Breast Tenders, Flour, Oil, H20 and Baking Powder (which was hiding in the cupboard for this photo...I had to coax it out...it was a hideously long process..but he did make an appearance just in time for the batter! Who knew baking powder could be SO shy????)
Batterrrrrrrrrrr up... Whisk together the ingredients...Isn't my whisk beautiful???? Maybe it's just me...But we are rather 'whisky' on the west side...cooking IS 'whisky' business, one might say....tisk-tisk....crickets???? are those crickets I hear???? hahahahahaha...
That was a terrible joke, no???? Sooooooo, dip your chicken tender pieces in the batter and deep fry...keep an eye....all I know is that if I keep my burner on #6, the oil is A-OK...and you can use your skillet of justice...again, the excitement never, ever ends over here on the west side...nope....it's your big shot baby...you're the next big star....
Battered chicken...I love, love, love this batter...it IS my go-to batter...doesn't everyone have one of those??? Like your go-to outfit..or go-to shoes...I suppose I should venture out just a tad more...I'm a dork..shhhh...
Combine your battered chicken with your sweet and sour sauce...And on a side note, I did not strike, castigate, nor maltreat my chicken...in case you were concerned...I'm nice! Especially to chicken...
Sweet and Sour Chicken with Pineapple Fried Rice...I won't mince words...tee-hee...I did enough mincing this evening..sorry...yeah..eventually I WILL exhaust that joke...it's just too easy...like me...hahahaahahahahaha....I am teasing...no derision on the west side...nope...not on a Tuesday night...I LOVED this meal...one of my top five favorite meals of all time...IMHO, fo' sho'
We've reached this point in the evening...the closing...the most difficult part...The finale...where I should express conclusions and such....I discovered that making sweet and sour chicken is way easier and more delicious than I had anticipated...That is a valid point...rather satisfactory one might say....adequate enough to produce a cumulative response....And we will no longer be silent..But, then again, keeping my mouth shut was never one of my strong suits....not that I own any suits..I work from home...I have yoga pants and skinny jeans and GREAT boots! Boots are way better than suits...IMHO...Sassy gals rock!! Have a great evening..I hope pineapple doesn't give you heartburn like it did me...so I couldn't even eat my Crunch and Munch...tomorrow, I guess..I hope to return... I am getting another tattoo at 5:30...so I may not blog...we'll see how it goes...exciting, no??? ...Oh, and why will you occupy????????
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