"Oh, Mama...I don't wish that you were dead anymore after sleeping comfortably on these 700 thread count sheets...which, we have yet to determine why they are of the utmost importance...but, since they are quite comfy...I'll allow that minor detail to slide...but just this once..."
I blame her sass on the jealously..She's A Rebel...not that there's anything wrong with being sassy or a rebel..or being jealous...well, perhaps...or maybe not..I'm on the fence in regards to that statement...anyhoo...I do have a new friend....don't get all too excited....he's a little slow...and I'm not a critically picky kinda gal...but he is slow...I wanted you to know...just in the literal sense...BUT he doesn't litter...at least I don't think...
Franklin...my turtle...again...I really have a bone to pick with this Houston-based Funtastic Toy company...allegedly he is a life-like replica, yet he is stretchable...in addition to those wonders... his other attributes include the ability to look and feel alive...I'm just not seeing it, folks..are you??? I can guarantee you, if I were to stretch a live turtle...the limbs would rip right off...no doubt! And what does one do with a leg-less turtle..He is way too big to flush...How far away is that Sellwood bridge??? hahahahah...I'm kidding...I would never throw anything off the Sellwood bridge... tee-hee...well, maybe just myself after this blog...hahahahahahaha...
"Oh, Mama....again..did you really say that out loud???? And when you do head towards the bridge..be sure and drop me off at Chuck's place and take those boots with you! I hate those boots...and I know for a fact that Chuck would never wear such things!" She's just angry becaus she looks like a cheerleader in this photo..and we hate cheerleaders..shhh...our intent was to not offend any cheerleaders whom may follow..hahahahahah...I know zero cheerleaders...can they even read??? JK...
Regardless...where were we....obviously way off the beaten path...well, it is not my fault...I blame..Mark Salling...yup...someone that remarkable should not be allowed on the internet...so, maybe it's really the internet's fault...for allowing him to be there...in all of his marvelousness..yeah..that totally is a word...
Here we are on vacation...last spring...I totally promised to keep these shots on the DL..shhhh.....but..I couldn't help it..and you totally know I'm there because he's drinking a vodka tonic... I will stop..Besides, no one EVER enjoys viewing someone else's vacation photos..tisk-tisk...
OK..OK..OK....'pet' turtles and Mark Salling aside...we did actually cook food..Yeah...good times never end over here on the west side..nope...they don't...nor do the delusional thoughts..hahahahaha...at least they aren't of the grandiose variety...well, not until tomorrow night...and when I become omnipotent...grab the straight jacket...I am sooo kidding now...but I do know that we did make a Chipotle Shrimp Tostada...and it was rather delicious...and I fought the law...one guess as to whom won!! tee and hee...
Shredded Cabbage, Mexican Cream, Lime, Avocado...and a little Franklin...instead of being all about the benjamins, I suppose it's all about the franklins at this point...c'est la vie...
Mix your shredded cabbage with the cream and lime juice...It REALLY was good...Who would have guessed! It can chill in the fridge while you take care of other things...LOL..get it????
"Mama...I am so over your tired, sorry jokes..BTW...do you know what the turtle was doing on the highway??? About 100 millimeters per hour...hahahahahahaha...I should at least get a little finger clap for that gem!"
Shrimp and Chipotle....we took the KISS approach, even though it was the weekend...but no regrets! Franklin isn't particulary fond of smoked hot chili peppers...but he is a fan of the Red Hot Chili Peppers..heck, who wouldn't be! Don't even get me started on Anthony Kiedis or the Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie...
Marinate your shrimp in the chipotle sauce...for a bit...eventually you will place these on a cookie sheet and broil...a few minutes on each side..
While your shrimp marinade, keep in mind a fried corn tortilla makes a tostada! So fry some up..in a little oil...simple, easy....I shall refrain..yeah..I know you're so over anything which references simple and easy to the Lone Foodie...hahahaha....but you CAN shake a little bootie...it helps to avoid the splattering of oil on your arms...and one does need to protect Lightning Man...I'm on a sentimental journey...into sight and sound...Hey, now!!
Chipotle Shrimp Tostada...place your slaw atop the fried tortilla, place your broiled shrimp atop the slaw...then top with sliced avocado, green onions and radishes (i totally omitted the green onions and radishes in the initial photos..please forgive me). I really did like this..quite a bit, in fact..and would totally make it again..
Wake up the house is on fire..and the cat's caught in the dryer..philosophy is a liar...there's no such thing as heroes.....Tostadas and Turtles...that's it! The best I can do this weekend...WIP, my internet friends...I'm on a mission...an expedition...We're about 2000 light years away from perfection, but never give up!! Grudges come back to haunt us..so be nice!! Have a terrific evening...I love you just the way you are...
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