See! I do not fib...His Name is Jose Cuervo...after those worms you find in tequila bottles...although, I know nothing about them..nope...zero knowledge...teehee
By now, you know me...I believe it is always necessary to carfully inspect the packaging of these toys...
Aside from the humor found on the front..the 'claims' alleged on the back were THE BEST EVER....in addition to providing directions...I was instructed on how my Magic Worm could wind around pencils and move between my fingers...along with a special note...'handle your Magic Worm gently. Keep Away From Water!' an exact quote...I guess it is a good thing it was not raining here in Oregon today...would have been most unfortunate for my new Magic Worm...and I am always gentle, ask...well, um..anyone!
Heeding the advice on the package in regards to water contact......I felt it was best to refrain from taking Jose over to 'The Wall'....just to be safe...So, he hung out with me at my command center...we had a blast! Who wouldn't enjoy reviewing telecom bills..???? They are a total hoot...sometimes keeping me up at night, in fact..shhhh...we do party like rock stars over here on the west side...yep...absolutely...especially with Magic Worms!
He LOVED my office....he was better at 10-key than Buzz...and had much better phone skills...shhhhhhhhhhh.....I may just make him my personal assistant...he does possess magical skills....winkety-wink...
Coincidentally, as the package mentioned...this Magical Worm could wind around pencils...that was right on! AND, I had just THE pencil for this worm...allow me to introduce my fiance...Mr. Giant Green Pencil....again, keep this on the DL...
Jose did work his magic on this pencil...they bonded instantly! Neato! As the package claimed...hmmm...neato???? Not quite...overzealous, perhaps with that claim...speaking from experience, mind you....I could probably name some things that are, in fact, 'neato', however...this is not one of them...although, that word does make me giggle...it's so...so...Brady Bunch..yep, it totally is...neato, Greg and, right on, Marcia! hahahahahaa
Where was I....this regression affliction...I blame Darren...and The You Tube...it is totally not my fault...SO...in addition to my Magic Worm...I found one other gem..well, not quite a gem...more of a disappointment...again, the packaging on certain items can be SO misleading...
I was eager for an instant winter! For reals!! As well as anxious to make my very own Yeti habitat...I had an ulterior motive, mind you....create an environment welcoming a Yeti...and you can snag yourself a Yeti...not indigenous to the pacific NW, however..his cousin, Bigfoot...may just look me up...I'm sure they talk and such...he could totally put in a good word....besides, I have pink hair...who wouldn't want that???!!?? We could have babies that look like those starlight mints... hahahahahahaa.....I figured he could totally give me a piggy-back ride through The Fred Meyer...they're pretty tall...yep, that's me...ALWAYS thinking...oh, yeah, baby....
Ugh...I really got off track...and I haven't even shown you the snow I created from my instant winter...I now feel like an instant loser...and it ended up looking more like instant mashed potatoes..and as one could fathom, they taste the same...
I really expected something much more spectacular...it was the disappointment of the decade...well, no...um...not so much..but..my neighbor stopped over to witness the spectacularness of this experiment...and it was a total let-down...From the package directions, I did expect TONS of snow....we only got a little bit...pffttt.....boo and hiss...
We did go to The Fred Meyer..the brand new one!
Here we are at a light! Woo-Hoo!!
"So, Mama,...what do you give a seasick Yeti??? Plenty of Room!! hahahahaha"
Alright...already...shall we focus on our orginal intent...putting magic worms and snow and yetis aside....dinner....nothing glamorous, however it was delicious....I guess you can take a gal out of Pennsylvania, but you cannot take the Pennsylvania out of this gal...Sauerkraut! I tried to fight it...I did...but, it's just sooo great!
Pork, Sauerkraut, Onion, Thyme, Apple, Brown Sugar and Olive Oil
Brown the tenderloin in your dutch oven of righteousness...it's only right...tisk-tisk...oh, and be sure and shake a little bootie while doing so...no regrets! none!!
Slice the pork...it is expected..and A-OK around these here parts...at least on the west side...shhhhhh...don't let those east-siders know... hahahaha
Proceed to chop up your apple and onion..it is proper...and expected...and paves the way to complete and utter deliciousness...sorry..got caught up in the drama...it's 'The Wall' affect...can't help myself...either that..or the music...surely, it is an excellent excuse...I am full of them!
A few tears were shed...I will not lie, nor will I apologize...I feel no shame...Green Day said it best...again, I should blame the onions..however, that is not exactly the case...hmmmmm....
They look so darn cute, don't they! And they taste ten times better!!
Not only did most everything turn out...well, except for the unfortunate disappointment with my instant winter....we were able to wear boots again! WOOHOO!....
E.V. was SO excited..she couldn't even keep her eyes open...nah, that is a complete and utter fabrication...she was appalled..in fact...prolly cause I'm her mama...and that's what kids do...hahahahahahaa...
"Let's get this show on the road, Mama..I am hungry! That super-cool nice neighbor did give me a treat, but I need a little more...Oh, and is that King for a Day I hear...well...TURN IT UP!!! Where IS that wand....shall we shake some bootie, so to speak???"
She does have a keen sense...and I DID turn it up, grab the wand....have some fun...why not! Then I ate a little food...and then had some Reese's Pieces for dessert..YUM! They were on my list, which I did not lose...who could forget those, anyway...
Pork Tenderloin, Sauerkraut, Mashed Potatoes
As previously professed, there is absolutely nothing glamorous about sauerkraut, however, do not underestimate its power...it is delicious...and underrated...the underbelly...go make some...trust me.....speaking of under...nah...I shall let that pass...it is best...trust me on this one....you understand...tisk-tisk..coming from an under-achiever..hahahhaa...Get your fists in the air...dye your hair pink...well, it's kinda-sorta pink...don't ever look back...buy a magic worm...don't try to create an instant winter...the more I think about it...a Yeti would probably make a horrible house guest...all that hair...and I am totally certain he would leave the seat up...just sayin'...I don't care if you don't care....we are the kids of war and peace....we're off to the land of make believe...however, I am sure that is from where we came...merely an observation...good night, my friends...we'll be here tomorrow..please, do not run away...If you do..go listen to Fountains of Wayne - Stacy's Mom...Awesome!
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